It took me long to realise that was what I actually was... Yaya, I noe some of you know that and are probably like "he finally knows".... Maybe I am not like that... Just indulged too much into it... This pit... I will try to get out... I want to... I can't take it anymore...
I waited... and waited... and waited and waited......
I really shouldn't have done that.... I thought I was part of them.... But I was not.... I was never....
I feel like I have been used.... I supported them, but was there really a time that they supported me??? I helped them, treat them so well.... But I dun get help when I need... They turn me away.... I was never with them.... I think I will never be, and will not want to anymore... I am treated like a ball... Kicked around...
So close yet so far... Today, an apocalypse occurred... Deep inside me... I can never recover... I try my best but it's not enough....
I guess I have to let go... It's difficult, but it's reality.... Should I let go or give another chance??? Chances are to be taken but I doubt they even realised what they have done...
They have torn me apart... I can't get my emotions right.... Part of them maybe they still see me as.... But I am no longer there.. All that is seen is the shell... My soul has dissipated into the air... I will no longer be the same....
They expelled it from me... Maybe they think they treat me well, but that's just what they think... It's painful... I am hurt... An apology is not enough... Nothing can compensate... I hope they know what they have done... But it's just too late... I will never be the same... There are scars, but they can't see it... No one can... Only me...
Things will never be the same...
I am only to them, just another person....
~Nigel~